Mom to Mom | Letting Go in the Land of Pretend

Addisyn and I have had a series of off days. Except our off days seem to have become less a rarity and more the norm. They are the kind of days where Not Obeying Momma holds hands with Not Working Disciplinary Tactics and they go right out the door along with their friends: No Logical Answer and Why Try Reasoning. This post, albeit positive in nature, could have very well gone in the opposite direction had I not had a few amazingly supportive women in my life; one of which wrote me the most heartfelt message telling me about her experience tasting humble pie when her second child arrived.   One day, on another post, I will probably share with you all the juicy details about how Addisyn tests me on a daily basis. I am pretty sure it will be therapeutic…. But today I require positivity - lots of it – to get me through a rough mothering week. And isn’t that the key to being a good mommy? Resting on the positive and relishing in the small loving moments to help get us through the negative days.

Yep, today we travel to The Land of Pretend. It’s a place where unicorns are the pets of princesses and playing house means taking naps every five minutes. And you know this mommy can get down with some pretend nap time. It looks a lot like regular nap time except she puts me to sleep. Maybe it is because of moments like this that I have begun to let go of the world of arts and crafts with Addisyn and embrace The Land of Pretend. Or maybe it is because my girly can imagine just about anything and I love to watch that unfold. The other day she tucked an almond milk carton to sleep; making sure the burp cloth blanket and diaper pillow were perfectly comforting to the baby.  Mind you, there were three or four actual baby dolls lying around the floor and she chose to put the almond milk to sleep. When I suggested that she might use a baby doll she paused, looked at one, thought better of it, and turned around to sing a lullaby to baby milk carton.    Today our pretend was that she was the mommy and I was the Addy. The three foot blonde hair me went through a whole entire day starting with a trip to the beach where she drove, told me to be patient three times in the back seat, and said that I will have to wait for my snack when I get to the beach.  We stayed for a brief moment at the beach before we were back at home taking a nap, or four of them, and then talking on the phone with her friend Meech and Brookie.  As the story goes, Brookie, who is also a princess, was coming over to play in her princess tower so I turned back into mommy to help make her a princess tunnel for Princess Addisyn and Knight Kellan to crawl through to escape the nice monster.  Aaah, The Land of Pretend. The place where things don’t happen the way you expect them to and it makes for a better story. I love it. There is no stress…just unicorns and princesses. And wouldn’t you know it? In The Land of Pretend I always make friends with This Doesn’t Make Sense and Just Let Go. 

With Love,

Stacy


I have a small selection of pictures this week. I am still learning how to be a mommy of two and have a camera in hand :-) 

The Young Family | A Virginia Family Photography Session

To say I was pumped for this January family session would be an understatement. An outdoor family shoot during the dead of winter is rare, but Heather suggested that we do the shoot on her family's farm if the weather was going to be nice and I was praying that would happen. I am sure you can imagine my excitement when I saw that the forecast was showing sunny skies and 52 DEGREES! And then I show up and walk around their land and inside their barn and I think I squealed. A lot. The lighting? Amazing. The Family? completely in love. The pictures? too many to choose from for this blog post...so I picked some of my early faves. I wish I could post more, but I want some surprises for the family. 

Heather and Jeff, thank you for letting me capture some pretty precious moments of your beautiful family! 

Blessings,

Stacy



I am in love with these two shots...I think I might bring Addisyn back here just to get one of my own. 

Seriously?! Could she be any cuter here? 



I think it goes without saying that they make one hot married couple. Right?! 



Just stop it with all this gorgeousness. Oh wait, don't stop! 



I took one look at his lashes and knew this would be a pic :-) 



Fave! 



Heather!!! you are PERFECT in this picture. Just perfect! 

Mom to Mom | Morning Blessings

I have a new alarm clock. She is about 3 feet tall, has wispy blonde hair that sweeps across her face then falls to her shoulders, the softest blue eyes that would make any momma swoon, and knows how to sport some footie purple polka-dot pajamas.  Ever since she hit big-girl bed status, I can guarantee a more gentler wake-up versus the old "Mommy!Mommy!Mommy!" that preceded this new found freedom. I love this  new routine so much more.  Addisyn climbs up on the foot of my bed and crawls to Steve’s side of the bed. I am barely awake as I reach across the bed and lift the comforter so she can nestle her body into the covers.  I usually re-position myself so I can sleepily watch her with one eye open. She finds her spot pretty quickly and I know she is cozy when her head hits the pillow and she begins to rub baby brother’s ear.  Most of the time there are no words spoken between us except for the occasional whisper, “momma, he’s so cute” and my reply, “I know baby, just like you”.  If I am lucky enough, we sometimes both fall back asleep in the quietness of the morning.  It’s a new favorite part of my day. A small moment right before my brain becomes cluttered with all my things to do for the day where I can connect with how my heart is feeling in that moment and where my daughter has all of her mom present.  I feel peace and I feel entirely in love. There are days when I am flat out exhausted and yet it is impossible to not watch as my daughter rubs her baby brother’s ear and looks at him adoringly.  I will ashamedly admit that this is one of the only times in the day where I don’t instantly snap to my more regular (and hormonal) response of “Addisyn please don’t touch him! He’s sleeping. ” or “Addisyn,  you don’t have to touch him all the time!” Maybe it is the stillness of the morning or the warmth of the covers, but I cherish  that time when she loves her brother so fully, first thing in the morning.   This has been the biggest adjustment for me...learning how to be a mentally present mother to Addisyn again. When for almost three years she could do no wrong; it seems like now my days are infected with short tempers. I know this is normal and a period that will pass, but it is my biggest struggle I have right now. And if there is one thing that I have learned the first three years of mommyhood it is that mommy guilt never goes away. It’s here to stay. It’s probably why we, as moms, hold on to moments like these. It’s the time in all the quietness where we witness our children acting out of love. It is in these moments when we know we are doing something right and we feel no guilt. 

***

Sister needed some good quality family time so we went for a walk the other evening and it was exactly what we all needed.  

Andrew {7 Days New} | Delaware Newborn Photographer

This past Monday I was able to meet little baby Andrew. I met his big sister last spring and was amazed with how much she has grown, but this time she had a little brother to love on. This whole session was full of smiles. Anna couldn't get enough of her little tinker bell pixie outfit or her brother and I couldn't get enough of baby Andrew in a pear basket. This is one beautiful and amazing family! I hope you enjoy a few pics from baby Andrew's shoot.

Mom to Mom | Adjusting

Adjusting.

That will be the word of the month. Maybe even the word of the year. From November 19^th until now it has been less about adjusting and more about surviving the day without a complete breakdown. I don’t think I have it as bad as some people, but I also think I have had the push-me-to-the-edge moments that I don’t remember with Addisyn. Her infant stage will forever go down in history as being hecka easy compared to baby Kellan. It’s true that there have been a few moments in Kellan’s young life when I dropped the incorrect pronoun in conversation, “Babe, can you go get her” or “Is she hungry?”, but he has retaliated by taking away my sleep. He may have failed his first hearing test, but Steve is convinced Kellan has superhuman hearing and decides to belt out his best and longest crying cantata the moment he hears our eyelids shut at the end of the day.  I’ve been dealing with the ebb and flow lately of good days and bad days. My good days look like exercising and a good diet, laundry, photography, playing with Addisyn and not wanting to football toss baby Kellan to Steve the minute he steps through the door. And my bad days are the exact opposite of the aforementioned productive verbs above- not exercising, not cleaning, not doing photography, letting the t.v. do my job with Addisyn and mentally breaking down at the end of the night. Can I get an Amen for that hot, quiet and peaceful 15 minute shower at the end of the day?  I will mention that today was a good day and it looked like this: getting hours of work done, eating healthy, cooking an amazing dinner, and running errands looking like a hot mess. The "good" part of the day is that I showed up at a department store in navy blue sweat pants, a black old sweatshirt, no make-up and a breast milk leaking issue (breast pads, breast pads, breast pads) without running into anyone I knew.  Whew!   

So I am adjusting to everything – having a second child, owning my own business, balancing it all, and taking care of myself with even less time in the day. On the days where I am nearing breakdown, I take comfort in knowing that I’ve been blessed with two children, I have been trusted to do this job, I have a husband I can rely on, and one day I will get my momjo back.   Until then, I am adjusting.

A small shout out to the Style network for your late night company while Kellan is awake so I can quote Giuliani and say things like “momjo”.   I take no credit for that clever saying J

I hope you enjoy a few pics from our Christmas!

With Love,

Stacy

This year we got to add Kellan's first ornament to the tree. 

We started new traditions of opening up one present on Christmas Eve.

Baby Kellan's first ornament from Nana and Pape

Another tradition of watching a Christmas movie before bedtime on Christmas Eve

This was her actual Christmas Eve present she got to open! 

her very special "Addisyn" chair

Her first reaction when she saw the picture below! 

And this was her reaction when she noticed she had a horse! 

And then we went to Virginia to visit family and can I just say that I have the coolest brother! 36 years old and asked for a skateboard for Christmas to ride it in the parking lot during breaks at work at his church !

He still has it! 

Oh and the cutest nephews ever!

Addisyn was able to share her dad and very special princess stories with the rest of the gang. She was so proud!

Grant and Jared listening to the story

Celebrating her early birthday with family :-) 

I think she is excited. Yes?

Ohhhh! Hi baby Kellan. You are so cute and peaceful here. I still want to smother those cheeks with kisses :-)