One More for Love The Story: Chapter 23 - Here Goes Everything

“Stacy,

I could start this email by telling you what I’ve been doing, how my new job is going, and how I am also glad we have reconnected.  But, I’d rather tell you about a feeling that I can’t ignore. A feeling that has come as calm as a cool breeze passing on a warm summer day and as strong as a raging tornado thrashing past me in concentrated chaos leaving me lost and breathless.  A feeling that has writhed within me to the beat of my pulsing heart beginning the day I first saw you three years ago.

I laugh at it now. How foolish I must have looked when your beauty froze me in place like a man caught in Medusa’s gaze.  I stood there mesmerized, taking in your every movement in disbelief that someone that breath taking could possibly exist amidst such chaos. Yet, there you were.  The busyness of the world blurred around you like water color spilled on canvas and in the center was only you in full focus radiating with vibrant splendor.

And now you ask if I’d like a date as if I could ever say no.  I can no better deny my feelings for you than Atlas can shrug the world from his shoulders; than the earth can stop revolving round the sun; than a heart can be apart from its one true love.   A date to start, but in truth I desire so much more.  I’m scared to mention what I might be feeling; afraid you might not feel the same, but if I were to be cautious you’d never know that I…”

Somewhere between the back of my mind and the front of my heart floated this email.  Indeed, the filter was off, but I don’t think we were quite at the point of me confessing my undying love.  Instead of completely breaking down the dam and flooding the city, I decided to tip the glass and let some water on the table. Here’s how the email actually went:

“Stacy,

Wow…a lot was said in your last email.  And, I have to say, it is a relief to hear that you are ‘interested in more than just a bbq date’ when you get back to the states.  The truth of the matter is that I’m not interested in just a bbq date either, but I wasn’t sure where you were in recovering from your break up with Chris.  I didn’t want to intrude on the ‘new you’ experience you are having overseas by complicating our friendship with my feelings.  I was completely content on letting you be you, attending a few friendly bbqs upon your return, and then slowly working my way into the topic of us.  But, since you broke the ice, here it is.

I’ve been attracted to you since the first time I saw you three years ago.  On my first day at the squadron, you sat across from me on one of the trucks and I eaves dropped on a conversation you were having about submitting an audition tape for the show ‘Survivor’. I was immediately taken by your delicate balance of beauty, drive, and intelligence.  You were married then and went on to date Chris while I was with Melissa. I never said anything because I didn’t want to start something between us by intentionally breaking up our relationships…no matter how trying they were at times.  Well that and I was pretty sure you were way out of my league ;). 

I don’t mean to be overbearing or presumptuous with my response, but only to let you know that as much as I have enjoyed our relationship, I’ve always hoped that if we both felt that there was enough between us, we could at least give us a try.

So, I look forward to our more than a bbq date…

Stay safe out there!

Hope to talk to you soon,

Steve”

Here goes everything… SEND.